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ARSENAL vs TOTTENHAM HOTSPUR (1230)
North London plates up the hors d’oeuvres to the weekend’s Premier League action. It should be a tasty Latin dish of top versus third with just a point between them. You can picture the expression of anger and injustice in the losing manager – both have honed that look to perfection. For the neutral, a good start the day, you’d hope. Home win.
BOURNEMOUTH vs BRENTFORD (1500)
For all their woes, the Cherries remain in approximate mid-table position, a single point behind their visitors. Both sides, on their day, are capable of pulling off a win and it’s hard to differentiate between them. Draw.
CRYSTAL PALACE vs CHELSEA (1500)
A customarily modest start to the season for the hosts and, by their own standards, for the visitors too. Viera’s Palace should give their guests a proper game, but it would be a surprise if Chelsea, with the benefit of a fortnight under Drill-Sergeant Potter, don’t take all the points. Away win.
FULHAM vs NEWCASTLE UNITED (1500)
For all their relegation favouritism, Fulham have shown that they should not be underestimated. They’re in sixth place, dontcha know? A full three points ahead of the Barcodes, who haven’t yet got their season going and who should be higher than they are. Is today the day when it starts in earnest? A monochrome battle in store. Away win.
LIVERPOOL vs BRIGHTON & HOVE ALBION (1500)
How long will Brighton keep shining with Potter gloss? Their present fourth place suggests it has some life in it yet. Liverpool, on the other hand, have some catching up to do. But as the old saying doesn’t go, a wounded Pool is a dangerous Pool. Home win.
SOUTHAMPTON vs EVERTON (1500)
The day’s other Scouse versus south coast game sees Everton buoyed by their first win of the season last time out. The Saints are an unpredictable lot, going down with a whimper one day and pulling the rabbit out of the hat against expectations the next. It could be their day, and they’ll certainly fancy it. Home win.
WEST HAM UNITED vs WOLVERHAMPTON WANDERERS (1730)
Timeo. Latin for ‘I fear’. The OS describes both sides as having made a slow start to the season. Other descriptions are available. But it’s true that both have managed six goals between them in fourteen outings. Which is piss poor and makes this arguably the least appealing game of the day. Still, there’s a brave (or plain stupid) TV scheduler who’s decided to put this on live for the benefit of insomniacs in Asia and beyond. The Latin duo of Scamacca and Paqueta must start, along with Cornet. There are contenders aplenty to warm the bench in their places. Wolves are tough to break down – they’ve conceded an average of just one goal a game (the same as leaders Arsenal) – and we simply cannot afford to offer them the freedom of the London Stadium. Yet: timeo – for another dodgy starting selection, for inappropriate substitutions, for players’ confidence on the wane, and for the effect of an increasingly exasperated crowd. We’ve all seen where that leads. But despite it all, do we – can we – dare hope for a belated, winning classic to warm the cockles of claret and blue hearts? Non on vestra nelly. Also Latin, of a kind. Draw, probably goalless.
*SUNDAY*
MANCHESTER CITY vs MANCHESTER UNITED (1400)
Ten Hag seems to be getting something right at Old Trafford, albeit slowly, but this will likely be his sternest test to date. City will be just too good for his side, though he will hope to leave the Etihad with some pride intact. Home win.
LEEDS UNITED vs ASTON VILLA (1630)
You feel that Gerrard is now on borrowed time at Villa, despite a win last time. Leeds are similarly inconsistent although they come into this on the back of two defeats and a draw in their last three. A Tough one to call, which makes the fence the most inviting place on which to park a prediction. Draw.
*MONDAY*
LEICESTER CITY vs NOTTINGHAM FOREST (2000)
The bottom two face each other. If there’s anything to encourage either side, it is the number of goals they’ve conceded: a whopping 39 between them in a combined 14 games. Other than that, the Foxes come into this on the back of six straight defeats (ouch) and Forest on four defeats. The fence beckons once more in what promises to be an intriguing, nervous and hard-fought midlands derby. Draw.
*CHAMPIONSHIP*
As October ushers in winter’s climatic pleasures, Sheffield United top this most dogged division sensing a delayed return to the place they left with such rancour in 2007. Lord Griffith would cheering in his grave. They host lowly Birmingham this afternoon, while tweeting up their backsides the Canaries visit still lowlier Blackpool. In the congested mid-table, Watford now under the command of Slaven Bilic, who will be renting rather than buying, have a tricky visit to Stoke in Sunday’s only game, but will know that a win could propel them into the top six. In the lower latitudes, the hapless Coventry maintain their steadfast claim to bottom spot as they host third-from-bottom Middlesboro. But just three points separate 11th position from the relegation zone, so pretty much anything can change rapidly with each passing weekend. Don’t keep your eyes off the Championship.
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